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Jowell Skiffington

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I'm back [Sep. 28th, 2008|04:16 pm]
Jowell Skiffington
My friend Wileena started posting again so I'm going to make a come back and start posting all the tepid details of my last bowl of cereal and/or my last phone call. Obviously, this type of brilliance can't go overlooked and quite frankly, it would be a damn shame if I wasn't able to tell you all the crazy happenings of the last three years. That's like 1095 days of phone calls from my friends that I need to relay (hi yall, kisses *smooch smooch*) so maybe we can start this one day at a time.

Thomas and I are no longer an item unfortunately. Even worse still, I married Trent and he now owns a failing hardware store. He keeps telling me he's a good business man but from what I can tell, he's just the same loser he always was. It feels nice to vent on here, getting out all these feelings.

I know you may be asking yourself why would I marry him if I hated him so much. Well shut up for a second and I'll tell you. After high school my parents kicked me out, quoting some garbage about responsibility and honor and such. But I told them, how can I pay for my cell phone if I'm on the street? Anyways, Trent let me stay in his crappy apartment for sexual favors and well, one thing turned into another and now I'm trapped here, of all places. I've done alot of growing up in the last few years and my myspace quiz profiles proves it.

I'm going to go right now as I hear my warden pulling up in his Neon, maybe this is the beginning of the end. Suicide always seemed like a losers way out before but now I understand why those terrible pieces of garbage thought about it before. Toodles!

From: (Anonymous)
2008-09-30 05:45 am (UTC)

you're a dead man-type lady-wife

If I even so much as slightly glimpse you in a fleeting and fading dream, i'll kabash your knees with the power of a thousand hammers combined with the power of at least one thousand hammers. I love you babes, and if thomas so much as lays a hammer on your thighs ... need i remind you of the hammers.


I baked you a cake and sent it to the warden. It's maybe a spoon or spork type thing, but thomas tells me this screwdriver is in the shape of a hammer.
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[User Picture]From: felix_beamer
2008-09-30 05:53 am (UTC)
Thomas also wanted me to tell you the cake he baked had a screwdriver or something in it. Just in case you took a bite and snapped off your upper lip.

Now that i'm an honest man, give that forsaken slut back to me!
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[User Picture]From: isolatee
2008-09-30 05:56 am (UTC)

Listen ...

You sir, are a piece of shit. How dare you reply to my post in an attempt to get your cockamamy a little moist, a little bit damp as it were. I'll thank you kindly to mind your own business. Why would I write things online so everyone could see them?
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[User Picture]From: felix_beamer
2008-09-30 06:06 am (UTC)
Piece of shit he says ... Trent tells me you miss the sweet caress of daddy's big mass o' meat shale, joel.
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